Happy In The Mean Time

Title: Happy In The Mean Time
Season: Season 1-3 up through Waiting in the Wings AU from there.
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to the WB and the Creators of Angel.
Couples: Cordelia/Angel…
Category: One-Shot



(Angel POV)

Red lace…

There are a ridiculous amount of things that turn me on…but nothing more then the scrap of red lace currently covering the shapely brunettes’ ass. She moaned as my fingers brushed lightly against her sun tattoo. God I love that tattoo…I shook my head and let the thought drift away.

No…you don’t love anything…not her legs…not her thighs...not her tattoo…it’s just sex…nothing more than a hard core fuck. She was lying naked, on her stomach, save for her red lace panties, rubbing her body against my satin sheets.

I trailed my finger from the back of her neck down her body until it reached her tattoo. I felt her shiver beneath my hand and I smirked. I leaned over and traced the same trail with my tongue. Her body arched off the bed slightly.

“Mmm…”

My hands moved up and massaged her naked shoulders as I kissed the small of her back. One of her hands reached around behind her to graze against my chest. I 'tsked' and my hands stopped moving. I made my voice low and seductive before speaking.

“No touching.”

She groaned in frustration.

“Angel please…”

I shook my head even though she couldn’t see it.

“Grab onto the sheets in front of you and don’t let go or we’re going to have to bring out the handcuffs.”

“But Ang…”

She didn’t get the chance to finish her sentence. I slapped her ass hard and she gave a startled yelp.

“Do it.”

I watched as her hands stretched out in front of her and she grabbed a fist full of the sheets. I watched her body tense up as my hands started moving again. Sometimes I feel bad…but most times my time with her is exhilarating…It has to be this way…it can’t be nice and sweet…nice and sweet would only lead to pain and death.

Ever since the ballet something between us has changed…we don’t acknowledge it around the others…but at night when everyone’s gone home and Fred and Conner are fast asleep…we indulge in all the fantasies that we spend the daylight hours thinking up.

The first time it happened was an accident. She was picking up Conner and when she bent down I caught a glimpse of savory flesh. That night she stayed after everyone left to help me with Conner and I couldn’t help myself…I took her.

It was rough and wild and that was when we figured it out…a loophole of sorts…no love…just plain and simple fucking…Sometimes in life we need to compromise to get the things we want…this is our compromise…I moved my hands down to her hips and played with the sides of her panties. I hooked my fingers in the sides and slowly pulled them down and off.

I stood up, tossed them aside and stared at the sight before me. The room was dark and the light from the few candles that were lit bounced off her body, giving her an ethereal glow. I glanced at the smooth, tan expanse of leg until my eyes reached the round globe of her ass.

Her long dark hair cascaded around the sheets over her head. I don’t ever recall seeing a more delectable sight in my 250 years. I could feel myself harden more as I glanced at her ass. I licked my lips and the grin returned. That’s my destination tonight…that pert little ass of hers…

“Roll over and move up on the bed until you can reach the bars on the head board. Then lay down.”

She pushed herself onto her knees, crawled up the bed and turned to face me. She slowly lay down. I walked toward the foot of the bed and I could pick up the increase in her heart beat as her breathing sped up.

“Grab onto the bars and don’t let go.”

She did as I asked and I stripped off my pants as I crawled onto the bed in front of her. She glanced down and licked her lips. My hands crawled up her legs playfully until they reached her inner thigh. One of my hands curled over her thigh spreading her legs so I had a clear view of her.

I took my other hand and grazed against her opening before shoving my middle finger inside of her hard. She gasped, lifted her bottom slightly, and moaned. I pumped my finger in twice and then pulled it out. it was covered in her moisture. I chuckled.

“Someone’s horny. Is all this for me?”

When she didn’t answer I hardened my voice slightly.

“Open your eyes.”

They opened. I held up my glistening finger.

“Is this for me?”

She nodded and her voice was breathy when she spoke.

“Yes…”

I stuck the finger in my mouth and sucked on it.

“Mmm…you taste good baby.”

I thrust my finger back into her and added another. I pumped in and out of her until her body was thrusting up to meet my fingers. I pulled out and added a third finger and her body vibrated with her moan.

“Ohhh yes…mmmhh…”

I looked up at her, took my thumb and rubbed on her clit hard. She let out a loud moan and let go of the bars. I smirked and stopped. Her eyes popped open and she gave me a confused look.

“Angel please…why’d you stop?”

I licked my fingers off before pointing to the bars. I spoke in an amused voice.

“You let go.”

She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She knows the rules. I got off the bed and walked over to the closet. I pulled open the door and bent down. This is the inevitable part…ever since we started doing this, at some point in the evening it becomes more about pain then pleasure…her pain…my pleasure…

If there isn’t any hesitance from her…if I’m not even a little rough…we get into territory that might undoubtedly bring Angelus back…so we never think too much…we just do…I pulled the clamps out and stood slowly…we compromise…

(Cordelia POV)

I watched as he stood up and turned in my direction. I licked my lips as he walked toward me. I could feel my clit throbbing as he kneeled on the bed next to me. He leaned in and captured my lips with his. I felt his tongue thrust into my mouth dueling for dominance.

Oh god…I love the way he kisses…I shook the thought out of my head. No…no love…love is dangerous. I don’t love anything about Angel…I like to fuck him and that’s where it ends…I felt his hand come up and cup my breast. I moaned into his mouth.

I tightened my grip on the bars and shivered as he thumb brushed against my nipple. It hardened immediately and he released my lips as he started kissing and sucking on my neck. I felt his breath against me as he alternated between kissing and speaking.

“You disobeyed me.”

“Mmmm…shit happens.”

I felt him grin against me.

“Do you know what happens when you disobey me Cordelia?”

I let out a slightly loud moan when he bit my neck with blunt teeth before licking away the sting. My breathing was growing faster as he continued to rub my nipple. I could feel myself getting wetter by the second.

“I get a gold star?”

He moved to my ear and spoke in a whisper.

“No…you get punished.”

Before I could say another word the cold metal clamped over my nipple and I cried out in pain.

“What’s the matter baby? Don’t you like my surprise?”

I shifted my body and his hand moved to cup my other breast. I could feel the clamp biting into my skin and I winced. A couple of seconds later he clamped one over my other nipple and I hissed in pain as he moved off the bed.

“Does that hurt baby?”

I bit my lip and my knuckles were white from how hard I was gripping the bars.

“Answer me Cordelia.”

I opened my eyes and shot a glare his way. My voice was dripping in sarcasm as I spoke.

“No, they feel good.”

I watched a wicked grin appear on his face as he climbed back up the bed. He came up between my legs and lifted them over his shoulders. He glanced up at me and I’m sure he could see the pain on my face.

“Are you going to let go of the bars again?”

“No.”

He nodded and then I felt his fingers spreading me as his tongue met my flesh. He caressed my inner walls with his tongue as he slid two fingers inside of me. I could feel my orgasm building. I closed my eyes as he added another finger, flicked his tongue against my clit, and quickened the rhythm.

My body was undulating, meeting him thrust for thrust. He twisted one of his fingers and the next time he thrust it inside it hit my g-spot and I screamed.

“Oh god…Angel…yes…don’t stop…mmhh…”

I was so close. He thrust two more times and scraped his teeth against my clit. I felt the heat rise as I came screaming his name. I felt my walls clenching around his fingers as he drew out the orgasm. I felt my breathing slowing down as he pulled away from me.

(Angel POV)

I watched her start to close her eyes so I reached up and pulled lightly on one of the nipple clamps. Her eyes shot open and she cried out.

“Oww. Dammit Angel…that hurt.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Shut up. I want you to turn around, get on your knees and hold onto the bars again.”

She got up slowly and turned. She kneeled on the bed with her legs spread slightly and hands grasping the bars. I moved up behind her, placed a hand around her so it was on her flat stomach, and pulled her against me. I rubbed against her ass and she moaned.

I leaned over her body lightly and whispered in her ear as I flicked at the nipple clamp gently.

“We’re going to try something new tonight.”

I saw her wince as I hit the clamp harder then before.

“Something new?”

I ignored her question and moved the hand that was playing with the clamp down to her ass.

“You have a beautiful ass Cordelia…”

I trailed off and I felt her heart beat pick up speed. She tried to move, but I had her pinned against me. There was a slight quaver in her voice when she spoke.

“Angel…”

“Shhh…”

I moved the hand on her ass around her body and started to massage her clit. She let out a moan and her head dropped forward. As I rubbed her clit harder I used my other hand to gently spread her ass cheeks. I looked down at her tight puckered hole and it looked back at me.

I licked my lips and plunged two fingers inside of her wet heat. I swirled them around a few times before pulling out and running them along to her ass. I rubbed the moisture against her and slowly slid a finger into her virgin ass.

Her body tensed and I kissed her neck. She whimpered.

“Oww…Angel it hurts…please stop…”

I slid it in further and once it was completely sheathed inside her I pulled out and thrust it back in a few times. I could hear her breath coming in gasps so I moved my hand from her stomach down to her wet folds. I started playing with her clit again and when I heard her moan I pulled my finger out of her ass.

I sucked on her neck as I worked her over. I could feel her trembling and I used my other hand to open her ass cheeks again. I placed the head of my swollen cock against her ass as I sped up my thumb on her clit. I gave a few shallow thrusts to get the ball rolling.

“Oh god Angel….yes…harder…”

I could sense her orgasm was seconds away so I sped up the finger on her clit and plunged three fingers inside of her. When I felt her walls clamp on my fingers, I grabbed her hips and thrust into her ass. She screamed loud in a mixture of pleasure and pain, and collapsed forward against the headboard.

I pulled her against me and pulled out before thrusting back in. I could feel her body tense against mine and I kept rubbing her clit, setting off another orgasm. By the time I took my hand away from her I was soaked in her juices.

I yanked her hair back so I could give her a feral kiss. She kissed me back and I could taste the salt on her lips. She’s crying…I hurt her…but I can’t stop now…I’m too far gone…I reached up and pulled the clamps off her nipples. She sighed and rubbed her nipples gently as I continued thrusting into her.

After a couple of minutes I heard her moaning again as she met me thrust for thrust. Her ass is so fucking tight. I rammed into her harder and she grunted, but I didn’t slow down the pace. I felt the end nearing and I reached around and rubbed her clit furiously.

I felt my balls tighten as my face slid into my demon mask. I grunted and as I felt myself start to shoot a load in her ass I brought my face down, clamped onto her neck and bit.

Her head shot back and she gave a keening cry as she exploded. We road out the orgasm and I licked at the wound on her neck as she let go of the bars and collapsed forward. I let her fall and plopped down on my back next to her.

The room was quiet as we caught our breath. We don’t cuddle…it’s against the rules. When we are in bed it needs to be all about sex…about the pleasure and pain…if we forget that for even a second…our game becomes dangerous. I sighed and adjusted my head on the pillow.

Not even five minutes later a loud wail breaks the silence in the room. I shift on the bed, but I could already feel it moving. I turned and saw Cordelia getting up and pulling my dress shirt over her head. Without looking back at me she called over her shoulder.

“I’ll get him.”

I watch as she made her way into his nursery and a couple of seconds later the crying stoped. I sat up, got out of bed, threw on my sweats and made my way over to the nursery. I leaned against the doorframe as I watch her with my son.

The moonlight shone through the window and in the moonlight they looked perfect together. She rocked him in her arms and she spoke to him softly.

“It’s okay sweetheart…everything is fine…you’re okay.”

I cleared my throat and spoke in a calm voice.

“Are we?”

She turned in my direction and watched me for a few minutes before speaking.

“Aren’t we always?”

I nodded and folded my arms over my chest.

“I’m sorry I hurt you Cordy…”

My voice trailed off and she shrugged as she gently placed a now sleeping Conner back in his crib. She walked toward me and stopped about three feet away as she crossed her arms over her chest. She gave me an intense look before speaking.

“It’s all part of the sacrifice we make with each other Angel…we do what we have to do to get what we want.”

She glanced down and I pulled her into a hug.

“I hate hurting you…maybe…maybe we should stop…”

“I don’t know if I can…”

I gave her a bitter laugh.

“Yeah…I don’t know if I can either.”

She moved out of my arms and smiled. She glanced around the room.

“I should probably go…”

“It’s late…maybe you should stay.”

She gave me a look and her eyebrows furrowed.

“We’re getting sloppy Angel. You know I can’t stay. It’s too risky…every time we’re together we’re putting everyone we care about at risk. Every time I stay longer or we get closer we run the risk of stepping into forbidden territory. We’d never forgive ourselves if we slipped up.”

I nodded. She’s right…we wouldn’t, but I can’t help it. This isn’t enough even though I know it’s all we can have until we find a way to get rid of the curse. I gave her a tired smile.

“You’re right…as usual. You can get home okay?”

She nodded.

“I’ll be fine.”

I closed the nursery doors behind us and watched as she got dressed and got her stuff together. When she had everything she turned and gave me one of her 100 watt grins.

“I’ll see you tomorrow morning boss.”

“See you tomorrow Cordy.”

She turned and started to walk out. her hand was on the knob. She turned it, opened the door and right before she stepped out I spoke. She stopped, but didn’t turn.

“I know it’s hard and it isn’t what we wanted or expected, but…is it enough for you? Sometimes I feel like your unhappy…”

I heard her sigh before she spoke.

“We all make compromises in life Angel. Any relationship is give and take. Right now we just have to give more than we get, but I have faith that it won’t always be that way. We’ll find a way…we won’t always be prisoners of the curse…”

“You think so?”

I heard the grin on her face.

“I’m Cordelia. I don’t think…I know.”

I smiled.

“And until then…what do we do until then?”

This time she did turn and I saw the warmth in her smile. She shrugged.

“We’re happy in the mean time…”

She gave me another grin before disappearing down the hall. I listened until I couldn’t hear her anymore. I walked over and plopped onto my bed. I glanced at the ceiling and grinned. Until then we’re happy in the mean time…I could live with that…