December 5, 2009

Memories of Us Chapter (13/13)

Chapter 13
‘He Was Loved And He’ll Always Be Loved’

“Did you ever wonder what it would be like if you weren't you anymore? If you were suddenly gone, how would your world react? Whatever you imagined is wrong. There’s nothing romantic about death. Grief is like the Ocean. It's deep and Dark and bigger than all of us. And pain is like a thief in the night. Quiet. Persistent. Unfair. Diminished by time and faith and love. I didn’t know Lucas Scott but I’m jealous of him because I see how his absence has affected the people that did know him so I know that he did matter to them. And I know he was loved.”

Nathan and Haley’s House
Tree Hill- 2013

“…wake up Brooke…wake up…”

Brooke’s eyes shot open as she sat up quickly almost knocking Nathan in the head with her body. He frowned at her heavy breathing and the tears in her eyes.


He shook his head.

“Brooke its Nathan…are you okay?”

His hand was on her arm and when she looked at him she could see the worry in his face. She felt horrible for making Nathan and Haley worry so much. She nodded her head and ran a hand through her hair.

“Sorry Nate…yeah…I’m okay. I just…I was dreaming.”

He sat down next to her and nodded.

“Jamie said you fell asleep. I was just coming up to check on you. Everyone’s gone.”

Brooke impulsively leaned forward and hugged Nathan. He was frozen for a second before he wrapped his arms around her and returned the hug.

“Thank you Nate. You and Haley have been so great. I’m sorry I’ve been so…well I’m just sorry.”

Nathan rubbed her back and for the first time in days he was filled with relief. He had been really terrified that this would finally be the thing to break Brooke. She pulled away from him and glanced at the door.

“Where’s Haley?”

“In Jamie’s room. She's just making sure he gets to bed okay.”

Brooke nodded and stood up. Nathan followed her lead and watched her walk around the room looking for something.

“What are you looking for?”

“May bag.”

Nathan walked over to the closet, pulled it out and put it on the bed for her.


He watched her rummage through it and pull out Lucas’ high school basketball jersey and a pair of boxers. She turned and caught him watching her.


He shook his head.

“Nothing…are you sure you’re okay?”

Brooke looked at him and sighed.

“No, I’m not okay Nathan…not right now anyway, but…I will be. It’ll take time, but I’ll be okay. Lucas…Lucas was my everything…he always will be, but I still have a family and as hard as it’s going to be to go on without him here…I need to.”

There were tears in her eyes when she finished talking and Nathan nodded.

“I’m proud of you Brooke…and you know Haley and I are here…”

“I know Nate. Actually I was hoping you wouldn’t mind me staying here for a week or so. I just…I haven’t been able to go back there yet and I’m not…ready.”

“Of course. Brooke you’re family…please don’t ever forget that.”

She nodded.

“Where’s Amálin?”

The question startled him.

“Oh um, she’s in our room.”

“Well, I’m going to change and then grab her. Thanks for watching her for the last few days. What would I do without my favorite brother and sister in law?”

Nathan gave her a small grin.

“I dunno.”

She gave him half a smile before leaving the room. Twenty minutes later Nathan made his ay downstairs and found Haley in the kitchen pouring herself a cup up tea. He walked up behind her and put his arms around her. She leaned back against him and sighed.

“I love you Haley James Scott.”

She grinned.

“I love you too Nathan Scott.”

She shifted and moved out of his arms before taking his hand and pulling him towards the back porch. He leaned against the post with an arm around her. Haley looked out into the backyard and saw Brooke dancing outside with Amálin in her arms.

She had been worried Brooke wouldn’t make it out of the funk she’d been in since Lucas died three days ago, but something must have happened because when she woke up from her nap she’d seemed okay. Completely devastated by the loss of her husband, but functioning.

And Haley was extremely grateful for that. Brooke didn’t deserve this…she was an amazing person and she didn’t deserve this kind of pain. Lucas didn’t deserve to not be able to see his daughter grow up, but sometimes horrible thing happen and all you can do is learn to deal with the reality that’s been thrown at you.

She felt Nathan had caress her arm as he spoke.

“She’s gonna be okay…”

Haley nodded.

“With time I’m sure she will be. She’s strong Nate…”

“I know.”

They watched as she spun around the moonlight shining down on her and her daughter, smile on her face and they knew that everything was going to be okay. Brooke stopped her gentle spinning and pulled Amálin close to her body. She felt a cool breeze blow through her hair and in the wind she could have sworn she heard him.

She felt the warmth of the breeze go through her as she looked into the night sky and smiled.

“You feel that baby girl…that’s your daddy…and he loves you.”

She closed her eyes as a single tear fell. The wind brushed it away and she felt him. Her eyes opened as she rocked Amálin. She knew he was there…that he loved her and their daughter and that even if he wasn’t there physically, he’d always be there in her heart...I’ll hold the memories of us forever, thought Brooke as she stood outside, under the stars with love in her heart.

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