Chapter 11
Chapter 10
“Hot Nuts”
(Ashley POV)
I opened the door to mom’s house and rushed into the kitchen. I glanced around and saw my mom getting something out of her bag, no sign of Amy. I let out a frustrated sigh.
“Where’s Amy? We’re gonna be late.”
“She’ll be here. You’re not that late.”
She gave me a once over and a look of concern flittered across her face.
“Are you okay?”
I shook my head and pursed my lips together.
“No, I am not okay. Look…I’m just gonna say it. I think you should date.”
My mom laughed and gave me an ‘are you crazy look.’
“Date…who?”
“I don’t know, but there’s probably a dating service for pregnant woman.”
I ran a hand through my hair and frowned.
“Yeah, probably…it’s probably for perverts.”
I rolled my eyes. Well she has to do something because I just found out that dad’s dating…
“Mom…before you let dad back in…I have to say something. I don’t think it may be the best idea after all. I thought it was, but now…now I’m not sure.”
I looked down and leaned her hands against the counter and spoke.
“Ashley he sold the house, just deal with it. You and your dad had your fun.”
I looked up and glared at her slightly.
“I am dealing with it and to be honest it wasn’t very fun.”
“Just spit it out Ashley…”
“You didn’t even have a chance to get out there. All because of dad and his stupid vasectomy. Come on mom please…just don’t go back with him just yet. Date…I mean go out with someone. Don’t you have an old friend you can call to go out with?”
“Well, I do have some old friends, but Ashley…”
I cut her off.
“Call them, send them a picture. I mean yeah you’re pregnant, but you’re still beautiful. Please mom…”
She gave me an odd look and tilted her head to the side.
“Is there something you’re not telling me? Are you and your sister conspiring to keep your dad and I apart for some reason?”
I have her a slight grin.
“That would never work with Amy.”
She raised an eyebrow and I sighed again. I don’t want to tell her, but it looks like I’m going to have to.
“He’s dating…or I think he’s dating.”
“Oh…well…go get your camera…”
When she didn’t say anything else I opened the kitchen door and ran back over to dad’s house. I jogged up the stairs and passed dad on my way into my room. He followed me in and called out to me.
“What’d you forget?”
“My camera. Oh, and by the way, if we do move back we’re not taking any of this stinking furniture from your store. I want something old…something antique.”
He shrugged.
“I don’t care. I just borrowed this stuff from the store anyway. I can just take it back and sell it again.”
I glared at him.
“You didn’t buy it in the first place.”
He frowned.
“What’s wrong with you?”
I looked away from him. You’re dating other people while attempting to move back in with my mother…that’s what’s wrong with me…
“Nothing…”
He smiled.
“Hey, it’s gonna be fun sunshine. You get your old room back.”
“No I’m not, John’s in it and you don’t even know if you’re getting your old room back. We could both be in the garage for all we know. And if we are you’re taking out the urinal.”
His brows furrowed.
“Oh, your mother asked me to take that out the week after we left.”
“What you kept it?”
“It’s brand new…I’m gonna see if I can sell it.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Maybe you can trade it in for a dog…I still want a dog.”
He shook his head.
“We’re not getting a dog once we get back in the house.”
“Exactly!”
“Seriously Ash…what is wrong with you?”
I crossed my arms over my chest.
“I heard you on the phone…making a date with some woman. You really stink you know that?”
He opened his mouth, but I didn’t wait to hear what he had to say. I’ve stuck by my dad through everything and we usually get along great, but he’s messing up again…he cheated on mom the first time around and now that they’re trying to work things out he’s dating? Ugh…I made my way back over to mom’s to take a few pictures. The day hasn’t even started yet and I wish it was over…
(Adrian POV)
I sat at the counter as my dad sipped his coffee. A month…one month until we move in next door to Amy…I can’t believe everything’s happening so quick. Thank god Ricky and I made up again. After everything that happened at his apartment a couple of weeks ago I wasn’t sure we’d be able to work things out…
My dad’s voice brought me out of my thoughts.
“See you tonight.”
I hopped out of my seat.
“Wait…30 days? We actually get the keys in 30 days?”
“We do. So you’ve got 30 days to get everything straightened out with Amy.”
He smiled and I rolled my eyes.
“Me? She called me a slut.”
He sighed.
“She’s a new mom, she’s territorial. John is her baby.”
“Yeah, so I was holding the baby. So what? It’s Ricky’s baby too. He let me hold him.”
He gave raised an eyebrow and gave me a stern look.
“You’re a smart girl. Be smart about this, and you know what I’m talking about.”
I glared at him.
“No, I don’t.”
“Right or wrong, Amy doesn’t want you touching her baby. So, apologize to her and tell her you didn’t realize it would be so upsetting to her and that it’ll never happen again because you really want to be friends with her, especially now that we’re all going to be neighbors.”
Is he for real? There’s no way I’m going to go groveling to Amy apologizing like I did something wrong, because I didn’t. Amy thinks that because she’s a teenage mom she can just go around throwing all kinds of fits…well she’s about to get a real eye opener…
“I don’t do that. I don’t apologize when I haven’t done anything.”
He let out a frustrated sigh.
“You did do something, you upset Amy, so take responsibility for that.”
“She’s the one who should take responsibility for being upset about nothing! And she owes me an apology she called me a slut.”
I could see a glare form on his face as he spoke in an irritated tone.
“Adrian, you’re sleeping with the guy who is the father of her child…”
What’s his point?
“Yeah?”
“No matter how much Amy says she doesn’t care about Ricky…she cares about Ricky okay? Deal with it. On some level she cares about Ricky and Ricky cares about her. I’m not saying they’re in love with each other, but they have a common bond and that common bond is the baby…and that baby’s not going anywhere. So, you have to figure out how to deal with all of this in a way that allows us all to be good neighbors.”
He just verbalized every fear that I’ve held in since John was born…and what I’m just supposed to push that all aside and be friends with Amy? Even if I wanted to be friends with Amy I can’t…she has the one thing that I want…Ricky…and he’ll always be there, in her life…
I shook those thoughts away for the time being and held onto the feelings of anger.
“Good neighbors? I’m not concerned about being a good neighbor.”
He shrugged.
“Well get concerned because I just sighed a 30-year mortgage. Have a nice day.”
I watched him walk out and when the door closed I dropped my arms. How am I supposed to do this? I groaned, grabbed my bag and headed off to school. Twenty minutes later I was standing in front of my locker looking down the hallway at the double doors waiting for Amy.
I felt someone come up beside me and then I heard Ricky’s voice.
“What’s going on?”
I glanced at him briefly before looking back at the doors. He looked toward them with me.
“I’m waiting for Amy.”
His head whipped around so fast if I didn’t know better I would have thought he has whip-lash. I saw suspicion on his face.
“Because?”
I rolled my eyes.
“Because I’m a good neighbor.”
He frowned.
“What does that mean?”
“It means that my father wants me to apologize for upsetting Amy and I’m trying to find a way to do that without slapping her.”
He chuckled lightly, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Apparently the thought of me slapping Amy isn’t all that appealing to him...
“Nice attitude…very neighborly. I don’t think I’ll stick around.”
I turned to him and sent a glare his way.
“Why can’t you just tell her that, that’s your son to and I can hold him if you want me to hold him.”
He shook his head.
“Because I’d like to continue holding him and that’s up to Amy.”
That’s not the reason…I know it’s not…
“You can go to court and get shared custody.”
As soon as the words left my mouth I knew they were the wrong things to say. I could see the anger on his face.
“I don’t want to get into any of that so try to see that I don’t. Adrian, if I have to go to court to get rights to see John then the court is also going to establish child support. I wrap pork shops for a living I can’t afford child support. I do what I can…I give her 50 bucks a week, but any court would make me pay more than that.”
I turned to him with wide eyes. why didn’t I know he gave Amy money every week?
“You give her money?”
He rolled his eyes.
“Yes Adrian, I give her money for our son.”
He turned his head to the doors and I followed his line of sight. Amy and Ashley just walked through the doors. He turned to me and pointed before walking away.
“Do not make problems for me.”
I sighed. Great…it seems like Ricky and I have been having the same problem as Ben and Amy lately…we can’t seem to stop fighting…
(Amy POV)
I walked down the hallway with Ashley and spotted Ricky walking away from Adrian. When my eyes caught Adrian’s I saw her jaw tense. We stopped in front of her and Ashley looked between us.
“I smell danger…bye.”
I watched her walk away before crossing my arms across my chest and looking back at Adrian. She smirked and spoke.
“You look nice this morning.”
She wants to play that way…fine…
“You do too…for a…”
She cut me off.
“For a slut? You’re gonna call me a slut again is that how it’s gonna be?”
I pursed my lips together and nodded.
“Mmmhmm…so think about that before you move in. If you move in…”
“We’re moving in alright…and you think about this…Ricky can just pick up his son and walk over to my house anytime he wants. And then I can hold John and feed him and rock him and be like his second mom.”
I felt a sting in my heart. She’s right…Ricky could do that…but I’d like to think that if he knows it’ll upset me, he won’t do it.
“My dad’s not out of that house yet…”
My voice trailed off and she raised an eyebrow.
“You mean he’s not out of that house yet slut?”
I nodded at her with a tight smile on my face. You know…I haven’t actually called Adrian a slut yet…I mean sure it’s implied, but I haven’t actually said it.
“30 days…I’ll be there in 30 days and then my family’s going to be there for 30 years…”
“Not if my dad backs out of the sale and you know what he just might because my mother is dating. I don’t think he’s gonna wanna move back in once he finds out she’s dating.”
Adrian laughed and shook her head.
“Your pregnant mother’s dating? And you think I’m a slut.”
I glared at her and spoke in a loud, irritated voice.
“That is it! I don’t just think you’re a slut Adrian, you are a slut…slut!”
A loud booming voice erupted in the hallway and our heads turned toward it.
“Ladies! Break it up now.”
Wonderful, it’s the coach here to stick his two sense in where it doesn’t belong. He turned to me and frowned.
“Amy I’m surprised at you…”
Adrian glared at him.
“Oh, but not me? Thanks.”
She stormed away before anything else could be said and he turned to me.
“I’m not gonna put up with this the entire school year so, you two find a way to get along.”
I’m so sick and tired of people telling me what to do. He didn’t even say anything to Adrian…he just let her walk away, but I’m gonna get yelled at? How is that fair? This is ridiculous. I spoke with an attitude.
“And if we can’t?”
“If you can’t you’re both off the team.”
I laughed lightly.
“I’m not on a team.”
He glared at me.
“The whole school is my team. I’m talking suspension…I’m talking about sending the two of you home and since you’re going to be living next door to each other that suspension wouldn’t be too much fun now would it?”
He started to walk away, but I had the overwhelming need to defend myself. Granted I’ve been pissed off lately, but Adrian is the one who started this, not me and I’m not getting in trouble for her.
“Look coach…”
He turned around and walked back toward me.
“You talking to me?”
“You’re the coach aren’t you? You should be talking to her…not me. I’m the good one…”
“Watch out now…”
My glare only intensified.
“What? Adrian called my mother slut…or she implied it anyway.”
“You called Adrian a slut. I heard you.”
“Yeah, but she called my mother one first.”
His voice was tight with restrained anger.
“I’m warning you. Show a little respect here.”
“I am not one of your stupid little football players…you’re not my coach…”
Before I could say anything else back came over and stood between me and the coach. He had a look of worry on his face.
“Whoa, Amy…are you feeling alright this morning? Were you up all night with the baby? No sleep?”
When did he get here? And why does he always think my bad moods have to do with John? I’m irritated at what’s going on right now.
“Stupid football players…I don’t have any stupid football players. Those stupid football players maintain a ‘B’ average.”
I laughed. By cheating maybe…
“And everyone knows how they maintain that ‘B’ average…”
“WHAT?”
I shrugged but stayed quiet.
“Let me tell you something little lady…”
I cut him off.
“Little lady? Don’t you mean little mommy? You’re prejudice against me because I’m a teen mother.”
“I am not!”
“Then what it is?”
“She’s on crack! Or something…raging hormones are like crack or at least that’s what I understand.”
I shot him an angry look.
“If that’s your way of defending me, then step aside.”
The coach glared between me and Ben.
“Why don’t we both step into my office.”
He turned around and I watched him walk into the guidance counselor’s office. On no…I turned to Ben.
“Office?”
Ben hesitated.
“He’s the coach…and the counselor this year…”
His voice trailed off and I could feel the tears welling. I never know when to shut my mouth…
(Ricky POV)
I can’t believe her…I can’t believe she got Amy suspended. Adrian has made her feelings for Amy perfectly clear, but she has to know this isn’t okay. I walked down the stairs and spotted her talking with Grace. I stood there and when her eyes caught mine she froze.
I stood there and waited for her. She said something to Grace and then ignored me and high-tailed it in the other direction.
“Hold it!”
She turned around slowly and smiled.
“Oh, hi I didn’t see you.”
I rolled my eyes.
“You saw me…are you insane? You got Amy suspended?”
I could see anger cloud over her face.
“I didn’t do anything. Amy got herself suspended.”
“Well you get her unsuspended.”
“How am I supposed to do that?”
I shrugged.
“I dunno, but if you don’t do that I’m never gonna be able to let you around John again.”
She sighed.
“Well…that’s okay. It was nice holding him, but it’s not my kid…”
I furrowed my brows. This is what I don’t get about her. She made a huge deal about wanting us to try to be serious and after that whole blow-out with Amy finding her holding John, Adrian and I worked things out and I agreed to try. Doesn’t she see that John is a huge part of my life and if she wants to be in my life she’s going to have to deal with John?
“It’s my kid…”
“I know…and every night after you go over to Amy’s to see him then you can come over to my house and we can have great sex.”
She grinned and I shook my head.
“Adrian…I thought we were serious about each other…I thought you and I were gonna start over and try to make things work. This isn’t making things work…we can’t be together if you’re not friends with Amy.”
I saw the smile disappear form her face.
“What? How can I be friends with Amy when she called me a no-good lying, cheating, to-bit low class whore? ”
I frowned. Amy called Adrian that? I can’t see her saying that…
“What?”
“Yeah, and then she spit in my face….practically.”
I don’t by that for a second…I opened my mouth and was about to say something when Amy came out of the counselors office. She was looking down and she glanced at me briefly before making her way out of the school. I sighed before looking at Adrian.
“You should be ashamed of yourself.”
“Yeah, that’ll happen…”
“Apologize…apologize to Amy or I’m never coming near you again…”
She laughed as she walked backwards.
“I’ll be near you whether you ever come over again or not.”
As she got closer to the door I called out in the hallway.
“I mean it Adrian!”
She just waved me off and disappeared. This thing with Adrian has been great, but if she doesn’t apologize to Amy…I’m done. Sex is sex I can get that anywhere…I don’t need Adrian for it…I just prefer her. I’m tired of the way she antagonizes Amy…it’s gotta stop…
(George POV)
I chuckled to myself as Ashley relayed what happened to Amy in school today as we walked into the house. I placed my brief case down on the table and grinned.
“I would have liked to see the look on the coach’s face…oh Amy didn’t cry did she?”
“Yeah, but I’m not sure if it was real crying or just crying for sympathy.”
Ashley crossed her arms over her chest as she spoke. That kid of mine…something’s bothering her…
“That Amy…wow. A year ago, she never would have stood up for herself…good for her. I wonder why your mother didn’t call me.”
I saw the anger come back to her face as she snapped at me.
“She doesn’t tell you everything.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t tell her everything either…I don’t even tell you everything.”
“And obviously I don’t tell you everything.”
“And I’m fine with that…so, she’s dating huh? Your mom’s dating?”
She shrugged. Why would Ashley think Anne’s dating…I know she’s not dating…
“Who would go out with a woman who’s in her third trimester?”
“I don’t know…”
I squinted at her.
“You didn’t have anything to do with this…did you the date?”
“I might have. Oh, what do you care? You’re dating anyway…”
She ran up the stairs and I watched her with a look of confusion for a minute before smiling. Ah, I know what’s got my little Ashley all riled up…she is such a silly girl…
(Amy POV)
After spending a good part of the morning at the mall with my mom after she picked me up from school I was able to come home and actually get a good amount of school work and cleaning done before heading to the nursery.
When I got home from work I actually had some time to relax. I poured Johns formula from the measuring cup into his bottle. That should be good. I glanced up when Ashley walked into the room.
“You better hurry up, that kids getting hungry.”
“I’ve had a bad day alright? Just give me a minute…”
“Yeah, it’s alright with me.”
I turned toward Ashley and sighed.
“Sorry. Thanks for hanging out with John while I made his bottle.”
She nodded and gave me a tight smile.
“No problem.”
My mind drifted toward Adrian and I was suddenly glad my mom decided to go on a date tonight.
“You know what, I hope mom has a great time on her date and I hope dad has a great time on his date too and not to be mean, but I hope you realize your responsible if our parents don’t get back together even though they’re having a baby. What were you thinking Ash?”
She rolled her eyes.
“What are you yelling at me for? I already know that you don’t want us to move back in here.”
My face softened.
“No, it’s not that it’s just…I don’t want that slut to move in next door.”
Ashley opened her mouth and before she could say anything there was a knock on the door. I sighed, turned around and opened it. Lovely…just who I didn’t want to see Adrian…
“Hi, can I come in?”
She was already moving over the threshold when I blocked her way.
“I dunno…what do you want?”
She tilted her head to the side and I could tell she didn’t want to be here.
“I wanna try to apologize to you again.”
I stood in a defensive posture.
“Go ahead…I hope you do a better job then you did last time.”
She glared at me and the attitude was back.
“Okay, look Amy I’m really sorry you called me a slut and got suspended from school.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“That’s your idea of an apology?”
“I’m not finished…I’m also really sorry that you’re totally insecure, selfish, and naïve.”
My anger was back in full force. Who the hell does she think she is calling me selfish, and naïve? And if anyone here is insecure it’s her…
“Is that right? Well I’m sorry that you’re a slut. A slut…and a slut.”
She smirked.
“I’m not; because being a slut is gonna keep Ricky interested in me and not you.”
There it is. That is what all of this has been about since John was born. She thinks Ricky is going to leave her for me. It’s what she’s been afraid of since John was born…
“Aren’t you being insecure? If sex is soo great with you then why are you so afraid that Ricky will be interested in me? Maybe having a baby together, gives Ricky and I a deeper bond then you’ll ever have with him even though the two of you are having sex?”
It’s true. No matter how much they sleep together, she’ll never be as close to him as I am…I haven’t decided if that’s a good thing or a bad thing yet, but either way it’s the truth…
“That’s an interesting point…I think I might discuss that with my friend Ben…”
She smirked again.
“You know in the long run while Ricky may love his son, he’s probably never going to love you because you ruined his life. Good night.”
She turned to go and then turned back.
“Oh yeah, and again…I’m sorry.”
I heard her chuckle as she walked away and I slammed the door shut when I couldn’t see her anymore. I turned to the counter and I things got blurry. I felt a tear slid down my cheek and I swiped at it quickly. Maybe she’s right…maybe I did ruin Ricky’s life…and mine…and Ben’s for dragging him into all of this…and John’s…
Ashley’s voice brought me out of my thoughts.
“Way to go, you told her huh?”
I swallowed hard.
“I hate her.”
“I think she hates you too.”
“Ashley, we cannot let her family move into dad’s house.”
“What’re we supposed to do Amy? I mean he can’t take the house back now she’s already moving in.”
I made a face.
“Well he can’t move back over here…he’s dating.”
“Well so is mom…I thought it would help even things out. You know I think maybe they should get back together before the baby comes or the baby will just be…”
I looked at Ashley and watched her eyes widened slightly.
“The baby will just be what?”
I could almost see the wince as shame crossed her face.
“Nothing…look I’m really sorry. I’m just attached to some stigma to the baby not having parents that are married and of course the baby can’t help that…but maybe the parents can…I really am sorry.”
I shook my head and I could hear the hurt in my own voice. I was fighting the tears because I didn’t want to cry for a third time today.
“No, you’re right. I do get that a lot. People ask me if I’m married all the time and I have to say no, I’m just a teenager. But…the looks on their faces are always the same. Poor baby…”
Her voice was soft when she spoke.
“Amy…”
I cut her off.
“I wish I could get married…”
This time she cut me off.
“To Ben right?”
I averted my eyes from Ashley. Of course I want to get married to Ben…I mean who else is there? Right?
(Ricky POV)
I laid in bed with Adrian with a grin on my face. I’m glad she apologized to Amy…I really didn’t want to stop having sex with her…I chuckled lightly and turned my head in Adrian’s direction.
“Wow…”
She smirked.
“Yeah…”
“I guess apologizing to Amy really did make you feel better.”
“Yeah, it made me feel inspired.”
I looked her in the eye and spoke.
“You did apologize?”
“I said I was sorry over and over and we came to a new understanding Amy and I…”
I smiled.
“Well, good, thank you Adrian.”
She gave me a cheeky smile.
“No, thank you.”
“Of course now I’m too tired to go over there…”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay I rarely miss going over there…she’ll understand.”
I could see the frustration on Adrian’s face as she placed an arm over her head.
“Of course she will.”
I was thinking back to earlier when I ran into Ben at work. He was picking up some meat for Betty to grill and we got on the topic of Amy…and Italy. I wonder if he told Adrian…
“Tell me the truth…did Ben tell you he had sex this summer?”
She turned to face me and I could see the interest peak back into her face.
“Did he?”
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m asking you.”
She gave a slight shrug.
“He didn’t tell me if he did.”
I looked away from her. I promised Amy I’d try to find out, but no one’s talking.
“I don’t know…you wouldn’t lie to me?”
She raised an eyebrow.
“Would you lie to me?”
I let out a frustrated sigh.
“One step forward two steps back.”
She gave me a confused look.
“What?”
“Nothing, something my shrink says to me once in a while.”
My drum solo ringer when off and I saw Adrian roll her eyes as she got out of bed. I reached over and shrugged.
“It’s Amy, I’ll just let her know I’m not coming by tonight.”
She was already out of bed and getting dressed when I answered the phone.
“Hi Amy.”
“Hey, I just wanted to let you know that you don’t have to come over. Ashley put John to bed a little earlier and he’s fine…I mean you can come over if you want, but you don’t have to.”
I sat up in bed and the covers pooled around my waist. It’s early for John to be in bed…I guess it all worked out though since I was going to tell her I couldn’t come by anyway.
“I want to, but I’ve got a test to study for, so thanks Amy…thanks for letting me know.”
Her voice was soft when she spoke.
“What test?”
I glanced at Adrian who had a silly grin on her face.
“Just a test. By the way, I’m really sorry about what happened at school today. Adrian told me she apologized.”
I could hear a slight hitch in her voice when she spoke.
“Adrian told you that when?”
I frowned.
“When?”
“Yeah, when? She apologized at school and then she apologized again tonight.”
Adrian blew me a kiss and I smiled as she slowly made her way out of my apartment. I caught the last part of Amy’s sentence and my smile was gone.
“The second apology was no better then the first.”
“What?”
I should have known…Adrian was way too happy earlier for someone who just made an apology she didn’t want to make…unbelievable…she lied to me. You know, she wanted to try this thing with us and make it a real relationship…when I saw Amy and Ben working things out I figured why not go for it?
So I told her I would…I opened up to her…slightly…and she’s lying to me. She doesn’t understand that John is a huge part of my life and she’s not even trying with Amy…
“I don’t want Adrian anywhere near John.”
“I’m John’s father I get to decide who he’s around too you know.”
“It’s not fair…it’s not fair…I’m his mother. I do all the hard stuff. I don’t want you and Adrian just to take our son out and have a good time while I’m at home doing all the hard work.”
Something’s going on…I mean I guess I understand why that would upset her…it would upset me too if she was taking John out and doing things with him and Ben…neither of us like to feel like we’re missing out on John’s life…I swallowed hard as I broached a topic that neither of us were comfortable with.
“Is that it Amy or is there something else going on here?”
“I dunno…what do you mean something else?”
“I mean if Adrian was not around…and Ben was not around do you think we might ever have a shot at a relationship?”
She hesitated for a second before speaking.
“I love Ben…”
I had to keep myself from rolling my eyes.
“I’m pretty sure I love Adrian. I don’t tell her that, but I think I do.”
“I can trust Ben…”
I frowned into the phone.
“Are you saying you can’t trust me?”
“Yeah…I would never wanna be with a guy who can not be faithful to me…so, maybe Ben’s the right person for me and Adrian’s the right person for you…”
I’ve never actually tried to be faithful to anyone…I don’t know if I can…but it’s possible I’d be willing to try if she asked me to, I’m just afraid of what would happen if I couldn’t. If I fell short of her expectations…would she keep John from me?
Would whatever kind of friendship we’ve spent all these months developing fade away into harsh words and hate? Is it even worth the risk?
“Maybe, but people aren’t perfect Amy and the more you think they are…the worse it’ll hurt when they let you down, even if it’s an accident.”
The phone was quiet for a few minutes and I leaned against the headboard of my bed.
“You never answered the question.”
“What?”
Her voice seemed startled when I spoke.
“You didn’t answer the question…you said you love Ben and that you don’t trust me, but you never actually said if you think we’d ever have a shot at a relationship…”
I let my voice trail off as I waited for her answer.
“I…I don’t Ricky…do you think we could?”
“I don’t know…I didn’t think we’d make it this far. I didn’t think I’d be a good dad, but your sister seems to think I am…I didn’t think I’d ever grow up enough to have a job and my own place, but I do…I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but I do know I’m open to different possibilities…”
She was quiet on the other end. Probably taking everything I just said in. I cleared my throat.
“What happened with Adrian Amy? Why are you so angry with her?”
“Does it matter?”
“It matters to me. I’m trying really hard here Amy. Adrian is my girlfriend now, so she’s around me…there isn’t anything I can do about that, but I told her she had to apologize…I told her that if she couldn’t get along with you then me and her couldn’t be together…so you need to tell me what’s going on.”
She was quiet for a minute or so and I was afraid she hung up until I heard her voice float over the phone.
“You said that?”
“Yeah…you gonna tell me what happened?”
She sighed.
“The only reason I actually called her a slut in school today is because she called my mother a slut…and then tonight…she was going on and on about how I’m insecure and naïve and how even though you love John…you’ll never love me…and that…”
She paused and I could hear the tears in her voice.
“And that I ruined your life…”
I felt something go through me when I heard Amy say those words…Adrian told her that she ruined my life? I shook my head. John is the best thing that’s ever happened to me…I love my son…Amy didn’t ruin my life. This is just like Adrian…but you know what, for once I’m going to keep my word…
I could hear Amy sniffling on the other end.
“Amy, you didn’t ruin my life. Look, I’m sorry about all the trouble that’s been caused by me getting you pregnant, but I’m not sorry about John. Having John has forced me to reevaluate things in my life and grow up…that’s a good thing…or at least I think it is…I don’t regret it Amy…none of it.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Thanks Ricky…well it’s late…and you have to study…”
I rubbed the back of my head and felt kind of sheepish about lying now.
“Uh, yeah. I’ll come by in the morning, pick John up and take him to the nursery since I didn’t get a chance to see him today.”
“Okay…good night Ricky.”
“Good night.”
I flipped the phone shut and just sat there. I can’t explain the way I feel about Amy…I can’t explain my overwhelming attraction to Adrian…but I know when it comes down to it, if things keep going they way they’ve been going…I’m going to have to make a choice…I think…I think maybe…I’ve already made it…
Chapter 10
“Hot Nuts”
(Ashley POV)
I opened the door to mom’s house and rushed into the kitchen. I glanced around and saw my mom getting something out of her bag, no sign of Amy. I let out a frustrated sigh.
“Where’s Amy? We’re gonna be late.”
“She’ll be here. You’re not that late.”
She gave me a once over and a look of concern flittered across her face.
“Are you okay?”
I shook my head and pursed my lips together.
“No, I am not okay. Look…I’m just gonna say it. I think you should date.”
My mom laughed and gave me an ‘are you crazy look.’
“Date…who?”
“I don’t know, but there’s probably a dating service for pregnant woman.”
I ran a hand through my hair and frowned.
“Yeah, probably…it’s probably for perverts.”
I rolled my eyes. Well she has to do something because I just found out that dad’s dating…
“Mom…before you let dad back in…I have to say something. I don’t think it may be the best idea after all. I thought it was, but now…now I’m not sure.”
I looked down and leaned her hands against the counter and spoke.
“Ashley he sold the house, just deal with it. You and your dad had your fun.”
I looked up and glared at her slightly.
“I am dealing with it and to be honest it wasn’t very fun.”
“Just spit it out Ashley…”
“You didn’t even have a chance to get out there. All because of dad and his stupid vasectomy. Come on mom please…just don’t go back with him just yet. Date…I mean go out with someone. Don’t you have an old friend you can call to go out with?”
“Well, I do have some old friends, but Ashley…”
I cut her off.
“Call them, send them a picture. I mean yeah you’re pregnant, but you’re still beautiful. Please mom…”
She gave me an odd look and tilted her head to the side.
“Is there something you’re not telling me? Are you and your sister conspiring to keep your dad and I apart for some reason?”
I have her a slight grin.
“That would never work with Amy.”
She raised an eyebrow and I sighed again. I don’t want to tell her, but it looks like I’m going to have to.
“He’s dating…or I think he’s dating.”
“Oh…well…go get your camera…”
When she didn’t say anything else I opened the kitchen door and ran back over to dad’s house. I jogged up the stairs and passed dad on my way into my room. He followed me in and called out to me.
“What’d you forget?”
“My camera. Oh, and by the way, if we do move back we’re not taking any of this stinking furniture from your store. I want something old…something antique.”
He shrugged.
“I don’t care. I just borrowed this stuff from the store anyway. I can just take it back and sell it again.”
I glared at him.
“You didn’t buy it in the first place.”
He frowned.
“What’s wrong with you?”
I looked away from him. You’re dating other people while attempting to move back in with my mother…that’s what’s wrong with me…
“Nothing…”
He smiled.
“Hey, it’s gonna be fun sunshine. You get your old room back.”
“No I’m not, John’s in it and you don’t even know if you’re getting your old room back. We could both be in the garage for all we know. And if we are you’re taking out the urinal.”
His brows furrowed.
“Oh, your mother asked me to take that out the week after we left.”
“What you kept it?”
“It’s brand new…I’m gonna see if I can sell it.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Maybe you can trade it in for a dog…I still want a dog.”
He shook his head.
“We’re not getting a dog once we get back in the house.”
“Exactly!”
“Seriously Ash…what is wrong with you?”
I crossed my arms over my chest.
“I heard you on the phone…making a date with some woman. You really stink you know that?”
He opened his mouth, but I didn’t wait to hear what he had to say. I’ve stuck by my dad through everything and we usually get along great, but he’s messing up again…he cheated on mom the first time around and now that they’re trying to work things out he’s dating? Ugh…I made my way back over to mom’s to take a few pictures. The day hasn’t even started yet and I wish it was over…
(Adrian POV)
I sat at the counter as my dad sipped his coffee. A month…one month until we move in next door to Amy…I can’t believe everything’s happening so quick. Thank god Ricky and I made up again. After everything that happened at his apartment a couple of weeks ago I wasn’t sure we’d be able to work things out…
My dad’s voice brought me out of my thoughts.
“See you tonight.”
I hopped out of my seat.
“Wait…30 days? We actually get the keys in 30 days?”
“We do. So you’ve got 30 days to get everything straightened out with Amy.”
He smiled and I rolled my eyes.
“Me? She called me a slut.”
He sighed.
“She’s a new mom, she’s territorial. John is her baby.”
“Yeah, so I was holding the baby. So what? It’s Ricky’s baby too. He let me hold him.”
He gave raised an eyebrow and gave me a stern look.
“You’re a smart girl. Be smart about this, and you know what I’m talking about.”
I glared at him.
“No, I don’t.”
“Right or wrong, Amy doesn’t want you touching her baby. So, apologize to her and tell her you didn’t realize it would be so upsetting to her and that it’ll never happen again because you really want to be friends with her, especially now that we’re all going to be neighbors.”
Is he for real? There’s no way I’m going to go groveling to Amy apologizing like I did something wrong, because I didn’t. Amy thinks that because she’s a teenage mom she can just go around throwing all kinds of fits…well she’s about to get a real eye opener…
“I don’t do that. I don’t apologize when I haven’t done anything.”
He let out a frustrated sigh.
“You did do something, you upset Amy, so take responsibility for that.”
“She’s the one who should take responsibility for being upset about nothing! And she owes me an apology she called me a slut.”
I could see a glare form on his face as he spoke in an irritated tone.
“Adrian, you’re sleeping with the guy who is the father of her child…”
What’s his point?
“Yeah?”
“No matter how much Amy says she doesn’t care about Ricky…she cares about Ricky okay? Deal with it. On some level she cares about Ricky and Ricky cares about her. I’m not saying they’re in love with each other, but they have a common bond and that common bond is the baby…and that baby’s not going anywhere. So, you have to figure out how to deal with all of this in a way that allows us all to be good neighbors.”
He just verbalized every fear that I’ve held in since John was born…and what I’m just supposed to push that all aside and be friends with Amy? Even if I wanted to be friends with Amy I can’t…she has the one thing that I want…Ricky…and he’ll always be there, in her life…
I shook those thoughts away for the time being and held onto the feelings of anger.
“Good neighbors? I’m not concerned about being a good neighbor.”
He shrugged.
“Well get concerned because I just sighed a 30-year mortgage. Have a nice day.”
I watched him walk out and when the door closed I dropped my arms. How am I supposed to do this? I groaned, grabbed my bag and headed off to school. Twenty minutes later I was standing in front of my locker looking down the hallway at the double doors waiting for Amy.
I felt someone come up beside me and then I heard Ricky’s voice.
“What’s going on?”
I glanced at him briefly before looking back at the doors. He looked toward them with me.
“I’m waiting for Amy.”
His head whipped around so fast if I didn’t know better I would have thought he has whip-lash. I saw suspicion on his face.
“Because?”
I rolled my eyes.
“Because I’m a good neighbor.”
He frowned.
“What does that mean?”
“It means that my father wants me to apologize for upsetting Amy and I’m trying to find a way to do that without slapping her.”
He chuckled lightly, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Apparently the thought of me slapping Amy isn’t all that appealing to him...
“Nice attitude…very neighborly. I don’t think I’ll stick around.”
I turned to him and sent a glare his way.
“Why can’t you just tell her that, that’s your son to and I can hold him if you want me to hold him.”
He shook his head.
“Because I’d like to continue holding him and that’s up to Amy.”
That’s not the reason…I know it’s not…
“You can go to court and get shared custody.”
As soon as the words left my mouth I knew they were the wrong things to say. I could see the anger on his face.
“I don’t want to get into any of that so try to see that I don’t. Adrian, if I have to go to court to get rights to see John then the court is also going to establish child support. I wrap pork shops for a living I can’t afford child support. I do what I can…I give her 50 bucks a week, but any court would make me pay more than that.”
I turned to him with wide eyes. why didn’t I know he gave Amy money every week?
“You give her money?”
He rolled his eyes.
“Yes Adrian, I give her money for our son.”
He turned his head to the doors and I followed his line of sight. Amy and Ashley just walked through the doors. He turned to me and pointed before walking away.
“Do not make problems for me.”
I sighed. Great…it seems like Ricky and I have been having the same problem as Ben and Amy lately…we can’t seem to stop fighting…
(Amy POV)
I walked down the hallway with Ashley and spotted Ricky walking away from Adrian. When my eyes caught Adrian’s I saw her jaw tense. We stopped in front of her and Ashley looked between us.
“I smell danger…bye.”
I watched her walk away before crossing my arms across my chest and looking back at Adrian. She smirked and spoke.
“You look nice this morning.”
She wants to play that way…fine…
“You do too…for a…”
She cut me off.
“For a slut? You’re gonna call me a slut again is that how it’s gonna be?”
I pursed my lips together and nodded.
“Mmmhmm…so think about that before you move in. If you move in…”
“We’re moving in alright…and you think about this…Ricky can just pick up his son and walk over to my house anytime he wants. And then I can hold John and feed him and rock him and be like his second mom.”
I felt a sting in my heart. She’s right…Ricky could do that…but I’d like to think that if he knows it’ll upset me, he won’t do it.
“My dad’s not out of that house yet…”
My voice trailed off and she raised an eyebrow.
“You mean he’s not out of that house yet slut?”
I nodded at her with a tight smile on my face. You know…I haven’t actually called Adrian a slut yet…I mean sure it’s implied, but I haven’t actually said it.
“30 days…I’ll be there in 30 days and then my family’s going to be there for 30 years…”
“Not if my dad backs out of the sale and you know what he just might because my mother is dating. I don’t think he’s gonna wanna move back in once he finds out she’s dating.”
Adrian laughed and shook her head.
“Your pregnant mother’s dating? And you think I’m a slut.”
I glared at her and spoke in a loud, irritated voice.
“That is it! I don’t just think you’re a slut Adrian, you are a slut…slut!”
A loud booming voice erupted in the hallway and our heads turned toward it.
“Ladies! Break it up now.”
Wonderful, it’s the coach here to stick his two sense in where it doesn’t belong. He turned to me and frowned.
“Amy I’m surprised at you…”
Adrian glared at him.
“Oh, but not me? Thanks.”
She stormed away before anything else could be said and he turned to me.
“I’m not gonna put up with this the entire school year so, you two find a way to get along.”
I’m so sick and tired of people telling me what to do. He didn’t even say anything to Adrian…he just let her walk away, but I’m gonna get yelled at? How is that fair? This is ridiculous. I spoke with an attitude.
“And if we can’t?”
“If you can’t you’re both off the team.”
I laughed lightly.
“I’m not on a team.”
He glared at me.
“The whole school is my team. I’m talking suspension…I’m talking about sending the two of you home and since you’re going to be living next door to each other that suspension wouldn’t be too much fun now would it?”
He started to walk away, but I had the overwhelming need to defend myself. Granted I’ve been pissed off lately, but Adrian is the one who started this, not me and I’m not getting in trouble for her.
“Look coach…”
He turned around and walked back toward me.
“You talking to me?”
“You’re the coach aren’t you? You should be talking to her…not me. I’m the good one…”
“Watch out now…”
My glare only intensified.
“What? Adrian called my mother slut…or she implied it anyway.”
“You called Adrian a slut. I heard you.”
“Yeah, but she called my mother one first.”
His voice was tight with restrained anger.
“I’m warning you. Show a little respect here.”
“I am not one of your stupid little football players…you’re not my coach…”
Before I could say anything else back came over and stood between me and the coach. He had a look of worry on his face.
“Whoa, Amy…are you feeling alright this morning? Were you up all night with the baby? No sleep?”
When did he get here? And why does he always think my bad moods have to do with John? I’m irritated at what’s going on right now.
“Stupid football players…I don’t have any stupid football players. Those stupid football players maintain a ‘B’ average.”
I laughed. By cheating maybe…
“And everyone knows how they maintain that ‘B’ average…”
“WHAT?”
I shrugged but stayed quiet.
“Let me tell you something little lady…”
I cut him off.
“Little lady? Don’t you mean little mommy? You’re prejudice against me because I’m a teen mother.”
“I am not!”
“Then what it is?”
“She’s on crack! Or something…raging hormones are like crack or at least that’s what I understand.”
I shot him an angry look.
“If that’s your way of defending me, then step aside.”
The coach glared between me and Ben.
“Why don’t we both step into my office.”
He turned around and I watched him walk into the guidance counselor’s office. On no…I turned to Ben.
“Office?”
Ben hesitated.
“He’s the coach…and the counselor this year…”
His voice trailed off and I could feel the tears welling. I never know when to shut my mouth…
(Ricky POV)
I can’t believe her…I can’t believe she got Amy suspended. Adrian has made her feelings for Amy perfectly clear, but she has to know this isn’t okay. I walked down the stairs and spotted her talking with Grace. I stood there and when her eyes caught mine she froze.
I stood there and waited for her. She said something to Grace and then ignored me and high-tailed it in the other direction.
“Hold it!”
She turned around slowly and smiled.
“Oh, hi I didn’t see you.”
I rolled my eyes.
“You saw me…are you insane? You got Amy suspended?”
I could see anger cloud over her face.
“I didn’t do anything. Amy got herself suspended.”
“Well you get her unsuspended.”
“How am I supposed to do that?”
I shrugged.
“I dunno, but if you don’t do that I’m never gonna be able to let you around John again.”
She sighed.
“Well…that’s okay. It was nice holding him, but it’s not my kid…”
I furrowed my brows. This is what I don’t get about her. She made a huge deal about wanting us to try to be serious and after that whole blow-out with Amy finding her holding John, Adrian and I worked things out and I agreed to try. Doesn’t she see that John is a huge part of my life and if she wants to be in my life she’s going to have to deal with John?
“It’s my kid…”
“I know…and every night after you go over to Amy’s to see him then you can come over to my house and we can have great sex.”
She grinned and I shook my head.
“Adrian…I thought we were serious about each other…I thought you and I were gonna start over and try to make things work. This isn’t making things work…we can’t be together if you’re not friends with Amy.”
I saw the smile disappear form her face.
“What? How can I be friends with Amy when she called me a no-good lying, cheating, to-bit low class whore? ”
I frowned. Amy called Adrian that? I can’t see her saying that…
“What?”
“Yeah, and then she spit in my face….practically.”
I don’t by that for a second…I opened my mouth and was about to say something when Amy came out of the counselors office. She was looking down and she glanced at me briefly before making her way out of the school. I sighed before looking at Adrian.
“You should be ashamed of yourself.”
“Yeah, that’ll happen…”
“Apologize…apologize to Amy or I’m never coming near you again…”
She laughed as she walked backwards.
“I’ll be near you whether you ever come over again or not.”
As she got closer to the door I called out in the hallway.
“I mean it Adrian!”
She just waved me off and disappeared. This thing with Adrian has been great, but if she doesn’t apologize to Amy…I’m done. Sex is sex I can get that anywhere…I don’t need Adrian for it…I just prefer her. I’m tired of the way she antagonizes Amy…it’s gotta stop…
(George POV)
I chuckled to myself as Ashley relayed what happened to Amy in school today as we walked into the house. I placed my brief case down on the table and grinned.
“I would have liked to see the look on the coach’s face…oh Amy didn’t cry did she?”
“Yeah, but I’m not sure if it was real crying or just crying for sympathy.”
Ashley crossed her arms over her chest as she spoke. That kid of mine…something’s bothering her…
“That Amy…wow. A year ago, she never would have stood up for herself…good for her. I wonder why your mother didn’t call me.”
I saw the anger come back to her face as she snapped at me.
“She doesn’t tell you everything.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t tell her everything either…I don’t even tell you everything.”
“And obviously I don’t tell you everything.”
“And I’m fine with that…so, she’s dating huh? Your mom’s dating?”
She shrugged. Why would Ashley think Anne’s dating…I know she’s not dating…
“Who would go out with a woman who’s in her third trimester?”
“I don’t know…”
I squinted at her.
“You didn’t have anything to do with this…did you the date?”
“I might have. Oh, what do you care? You’re dating anyway…”
She ran up the stairs and I watched her with a look of confusion for a minute before smiling. Ah, I know what’s got my little Ashley all riled up…she is such a silly girl…
(Amy POV)
After spending a good part of the morning at the mall with my mom after she picked me up from school I was able to come home and actually get a good amount of school work and cleaning done before heading to the nursery.
When I got home from work I actually had some time to relax. I poured Johns formula from the measuring cup into his bottle. That should be good. I glanced up when Ashley walked into the room.
“You better hurry up, that kids getting hungry.”
“I’ve had a bad day alright? Just give me a minute…”
“Yeah, it’s alright with me.”
I turned toward Ashley and sighed.
“Sorry. Thanks for hanging out with John while I made his bottle.”
She nodded and gave me a tight smile.
“No problem.”
My mind drifted toward Adrian and I was suddenly glad my mom decided to go on a date tonight.
“You know what, I hope mom has a great time on her date and I hope dad has a great time on his date too and not to be mean, but I hope you realize your responsible if our parents don’t get back together even though they’re having a baby. What were you thinking Ash?”
She rolled her eyes.
“What are you yelling at me for? I already know that you don’t want us to move back in here.”
My face softened.
“No, it’s not that it’s just…I don’t want that slut to move in next door.”
Ashley opened her mouth and before she could say anything there was a knock on the door. I sighed, turned around and opened it. Lovely…just who I didn’t want to see Adrian…
“Hi, can I come in?”
She was already moving over the threshold when I blocked her way.
“I dunno…what do you want?”
She tilted her head to the side and I could tell she didn’t want to be here.
“I wanna try to apologize to you again.”
I stood in a defensive posture.
“Go ahead…I hope you do a better job then you did last time.”
She glared at me and the attitude was back.
“Okay, look Amy I’m really sorry you called me a slut and got suspended from school.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“That’s your idea of an apology?”
“I’m not finished…I’m also really sorry that you’re totally insecure, selfish, and naïve.”
My anger was back in full force. Who the hell does she think she is calling me selfish, and naïve? And if anyone here is insecure it’s her…
“Is that right? Well I’m sorry that you’re a slut. A slut…and a slut.”
She smirked.
“I’m not; because being a slut is gonna keep Ricky interested in me and not you.”
There it is. That is what all of this has been about since John was born. She thinks Ricky is going to leave her for me. It’s what she’s been afraid of since John was born…
“Aren’t you being insecure? If sex is soo great with you then why are you so afraid that Ricky will be interested in me? Maybe having a baby together, gives Ricky and I a deeper bond then you’ll ever have with him even though the two of you are having sex?”
It’s true. No matter how much they sleep together, she’ll never be as close to him as I am…I haven’t decided if that’s a good thing or a bad thing yet, but either way it’s the truth…
“That’s an interesting point…I think I might discuss that with my friend Ben…”
She smirked again.
“You know in the long run while Ricky may love his son, he’s probably never going to love you because you ruined his life. Good night.”
She turned to go and then turned back.
“Oh yeah, and again…I’m sorry.”
I heard her chuckle as she walked away and I slammed the door shut when I couldn’t see her anymore. I turned to the counter and I things got blurry. I felt a tear slid down my cheek and I swiped at it quickly. Maybe she’s right…maybe I did ruin Ricky’s life…and mine…and Ben’s for dragging him into all of this…and John’s…
Ashley’s voice brought me out of my thoughts.
“Way to go, you told her huh?”
I swallowed hard.
“I hate her.”
“I think she hates you too.”
“Ashley, we cannot let her family move into dad’s house.”
“What’re we supposed to do Amy? I mean he can’t take the house back now she’s already moving in.”
I made a face.
“Well he can’t move back over here…he’s dating.”
“Well so is mom…I thought it would help even things out. You know I think maybe they should get back together before the baby comes or the baby will just be…”
I looked at Ashley and watched her eyes widened slightly.
“The baby will just be what?”
I could almost see the wince as shame crossed her face.
“Nothing…look I’m really sorry. I’m just attached to some stigma to the baby not having parents that are married and of course the baby can’t help that…but maybe the parents can…I really am sorry.”
I shook my head and I could hear the hurt in my own voice. I was fighting the tears because I didn’t want to cry for a third time today.
“No, you’re right. I do get that a lot. People ask me if I’m married all the time and I have to say no, I’m just a teenager. But…the looks on their faces are always the same. Poor baby…”
Her voice was soft when she spoke.
“Amy…”
I cut her off.
“I wish I could get married…”
This time she cut me off.
“To Ben right?”
I averted my eyes from Ashley. Of course I want to get married to Ben…I mean who else is there? Right?
(Ricky POV)
I laid in bed with Adrian with a grin on my face. I’m glad she apologized to Amy…I really didn’t want to stop having sex with her…I chuckled lightly and turned my head in Adrian’s direction.
“Wow…”
She smirked.
“Yeah…”
“I guess apologizing to Amy really did make you feel better.”
“Yeah, it made me feel inspired.”
I looked her in the eye and spoke.
“You did apologize?”
“I said I was sorry over and over and we came to a new understanding Amy and I…”
I smiled.
“Well, good, thank you Adrian.”
She gave me a cheeky smile.
“No, thank you.”
“Of course now I’m too tired to go over there…”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay I rarely miss going over there…she’ll understand.”
I could see the frustration on Adrian’s face as she placed an arm over her head.
“Of course she will.”
I was thinking back to earlier when I ran into Ben at work. He was picking up some meat for Betty to grill and we got on the topic of Amy…and Italy. I wonder if he told Adrian…
“Tell me the truth…did Ben tell you he had sex this summer?”
She turned to face me and I could see the interest peak back into her face.
“Did he?”
I rolled my eyes.
“I’m asking you.”
She gave a slight shrug.
“He didn’t tell me if he did.”
I looked away from her. I promised Amy I’d try to find out, but no one’s talking.
“I don’t know…you wouldn’t lie to me?”
She raised an eyebrow.
“Would you lie to me?”
I let out a frustrated sigh.
“One step forward two steps back.”
She gave me a confused look.
“What?”
“Nothing, something my shrink says to me once in a while.”
My drum solo ringer when off and I saw Adrian roll her eyes as she got out of bed. I reached over and shrugged.
“It’s Amy, I’ll just let her know I’m not coming by tonight.”
She was already out of bed and getting dressed when I answered the phone.
“Hi Amy.”
“Hey, I just wanted to let you know that you don’t have to come over. Ashley put John to bed a little earlier and he’s fine…I mean you can come over if you want, but you don’t have to.”
I sat up in bed and the covers pooled around my waist. It’s early for John to be in bed…I guess it all worked out though since I was going to tell her I couldn’t come by anyway.
“I want to, but I’ve got a test to study for, so thanks Amy…thanks for letting me know.”
Her voice was soft when she spoke.
“What test?”
I glanced at Adrian who had a silly grin on her face.
“Just a test. By the way, I’m really sorry about what happened at school today. Adrian told me she apologized.”
I could hear a slight hitch in her voice when she spoke.
“Adrian told you that when?”
I frowned.
“When?”
“Yeah, when? She apologized at school and then she apologized again tonight.”
Adrian blew me a kiss and I smiled as she slowly made her way out of my apartment. I caught the last part of Amy’s sentence and my smile was gone.
“The second apology was no better then the first.”
“What?”
I should have known…Adrian was way too happy earlier for someone who just made an apology she didn’t want to make…unbelievable…she lied to me. You know, she wanted to try this thing with us and make it a real relationship…when I saw Amy and Ben working things out I figured why not go for it?
So I told her I would…I opened up to her…slightly…and she’s lying to me. She doesn’t understand that John is a huge part of my life and she’s not even trying with Amy…
“I don’t want Adrian anywhere near John.”
“I’m John’s father I get to decide who he’s around too you know.”
“It’s not fair…it’s not fair…I’m his mother. I do all the hard stuff. I don’t want you and Adrian just to take our son out and have a good time while I’m at home doing all the hard work.”
Something’s going on…I mean I guess I understand why that would upset her…it would upset me too if she was taking John out and doing things with him and Ben…neither of us like to feel like we’re missing out on John’s life…I swallowed hard as I broached a topic that neither of us were comfortable with.
“Is that it Amy or is there something else going on here?”
“I dunno…what do you mean something else?”
“I mean if Adrian was not around…and Ben was not around do you think we might ever have a shot at a relationship?”
She hesitated for a second before speaking.
“I love Ben…”
I had to keep myself from rolling my eyes.
“I’m pretty sure I love Adrian. I don’t tell her that, but I think I do.”
“I can trust Ben…”
I frowned into the phone.
“Are you saying you can’t trust me?”
“Yeah…I would never wanna be with a guy who can not be faithful to me…so, maybe Ben’s the right person for me and Adrian’s the right person for you…”
I’ve never actually tried to be faithful to anyone…I don’t know if I can…but it’s possible I’d be willing to try if she asked me to, I’m just afraid of what would happen if I couldn’t. If I fell short of her expectations…would she keep John from me?
Would whatever kind of friendship we’ve spent all these months developing fade away into harsh words and hate? Is it even worth the risk?
“Maybe, but people aren’t perfect Amy and the more you think they are…the worse it’ll hurt when they let you down, even if it’s an accident.”
The phone was quiet for a few minutes and I leaned against the headboard of my bed.
“You never answered the question.”
“What?”
Her voice seemed startled when I spoke.
“You didn’t answer the question…you said you love Ben and that you don’t trust me, but you never actually said if you think we’d ever have a shot at a relationship…”
I let my voice trail off as I waited for her answer.
“I…I don’t Ricky…do you think we could?”
“I don’t know…I didn’t think we’d make it this far. I didn’t think I’d be a good dad, but your sister seems to think I am…I didn’t think I’d ever grow up enough to have a job and my own place, but I do…I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but I do know I’m open to different possibilities…”
She was quiet on the other end. Probably taking everything I just said in. I cleared my throat.
“What happened with Adrian Amy? Why are you so angry with her?”
“Does it matter?”
“It matters to me. I’m trying really hard here Amy. Adrian is my girlfriend now, so she’s around me…there isn’t anything I can do about that, but I told her she had to apologize…I told her that if she couldn’t get along with you then me and her couldn’t be together…so you need to tell me what’s going on.”
She was quiet for a minute or so and I was afraid she hung up until I heard her voice float over the phone.
“You said that?”
“Yeah…you gonna tell me what happened?”
She sighed.
“The only reason I actually called her a slut in school today is because she called my mother a slut…and then tonight…she was going on and on about how I’m insecure and naïve and how even though you love John…you’ll never love me…and that…”
She paused and I could hear the tears in her voice.
“And that I ruined your life…”
I felt something go through me when I heard Amy say those words…Adrian told her that she ruined my life? I shook my head. John is the best thing that’s ever happened to me…I love my son…Amy didn’t ruin my life. This is just like Adrian…but you know what, for once I’m going to keep my word…
I could hear Amy sniffling on the other end.
“Amy, you didn’t ruin my life. Look, I’m sorry about all the trouble that’s been caused by me getting you pregnant, but I’m not sorry about John. Having John has forced me to reevaluate things in my life and grow up…that’s a good thing…or at least I think it is…I don’t regret it Amy…none of it.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
“Thanks Ricky…well it’s late…and you have to study…”
I rubbed the back of my head and felt kind of sheepish about lying now.
“Uh, yeah. I’ll come by in the morning, pick John up and take him to the nursery since I didn’t get a chance to see him today.”
“Okay…good night Ricky.”
“Good night.”
I flipped the phone shut and just sat there. I can’t explain the way I feel about Amy…I can’t explain my overwhelming attraction to Adrian…but I know when it comes down to it, if things keep going they way they’ve been going…I’m going to have to make a choice…I think…I think maybe…I’ve already made it…
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